Meranda, Todd Allen (TJ), Jr.

              UTAH VALLEY UNIVERSITY
Utah Valley University Library
George Sutherland Archives & Special Collections
Oral History Program
800 W University Parkway, Orem, Utah 84058 Ph: 801-863-8821
Veterans of Iraq & Afghanistan
Oral History Project
Directed by Catherine McIntyre
Interview with Todd Allen Meranda, Jr.
Conducted by
Catherine McIntyre
October 26, 2015
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VETERANS OF IRAQ AND AFGHANISTAN ORAL HISTORY PROJECT
UTAH VALLEY UNIVERSITY LIBRARY & GEORGE SUTHERLAND ARCHIVES
Interview with TJ Meranda
CM: Catherine McIntyre, Archivist
TM: Todd Allen Meranda, Jr. (TJ), Veteran
CM: Today is October 26, 2015, and we're here in the Sutherland Archives interviewing TJ Meranda for
the Current Veterans Oral History program. We're very happy to have you here-thank you so much for
coming, TJ. I'll just ask you some basic questions about your history. Tell us where you were born and
when.
TJ: I was born August 6, 1981 in Provo Utah, Utah Valley.
CM: Did you grow up here in Provo?
TM: I grew up in Orem, actually, at right at 327 West 255 South. We lived there until it was my
freshman year in college. My grandma moved in with the family and we needed more space, so we
moved over, still stayed in Orem, over to about 400 North in Orem.
CM: Which high school did you go to?
TM: Mountain View High School, good times back there.
CM: What does TJ stand for?
TM: Todd Junior. My have is Todd Allen Meranda, Jr. My dad, they liked the name so much that they
kept it for me too, and then my first born. Well there is a little more to the story behind my son's--his
name is Todd Allen Meranda, III--we call him Trip, but there's a little bit more behind his name as well.
CM: that's nice to keep it in the family. What stands out about your childhood?
TM: Very close family. I had two very hard-working parents. They worked-dad was an iron worker
when I was very young, and then he switched professions and went from iron working to hairdressing.
He went to hair school and he got tired of being out of town all the time. Mom worked always worked
at least two or three jobs. Right now she is a secretary at Lakeridge Junior High, and does permanent
makeup. My sister and I, growing up it was us, just the two of us a lot of the time. It was fun-I took care
of her when she was younger, and when we got older the roles switched, and she started taking care of
me a little more. But my family is very close. I came from a very close family. We didn't have a ton
growing up, but we made do with what we had and we are happy. A good time for us is just to hang out
and watch movies.
CM: Was there any military background in your family?
TM: My grandfather was in the Navy. He was what they called at the time UDT. He didn't talk much
about it. He was in WWII, and I knew he was in the Navy, but he told me Navy story but never actually
told me what he did. When I was training in California, I did what's called the Recon Indoc--
[Reconnaissance Indoctrination], that's over in Coronado. My buddy and I were walking around
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Coronado, that's where the SEALs all train. And there was a wall with all the SEALS that have gone
through, their names on it, and I looked at my grandpa's there and I found his name on there, and I was
kind of put off, like, Grandpa wasn't in this, so why is he up there? A Master Chief heard me say that,
and said, well back then they didn’t call them SEALS; they called them UDT.
CM: What does that mean, or stand for?
TM: Underwater Demolition Team, I believe, I'm not positive. So, I found that out and called my dad,
and asked, "Did you know grandpa was kind of a tough guy?" And he said, yeah, I knew that. (Laughs.)
So that was kind of fun to find out. He wasn't very happy when I told him I joined the Marine Corps
(laughs.)
CM: Why not?
TM: Because at the time I was joining I was on a scholarship here at Utah Valley [University,] a baseball
scholarship. It’s one of those things that you're proud that you did it but you don't really want a loved
on doing it, because he knew what I was going to be going in to.
CM: what did make you want to enlist? Were you aware of what was going on in the world, like in the
Middle East?
TM: I almost joined right out of high school. I always-the military had me interested. It was always
something. I remember the first time I saw Saving Private Ryan. All my friends said, ah, I'd never do
that, and I said, I wish I could have been a part of that. Not the jumping out of the boat and going up the
hill, but being a part of something like that. So I started-I was a sports guy in high school-I played
football and baseball. In football-I'm 5'6', so I didn't really want to pursue football in college, I felt like I
was too small. Baseball is my sport. Half way through the year, I didn't know there was a moratorium.
The coaches couldn't talk to high school seniors. They had to let us play until a certain time and then
they could contact us. So I just thought I wasn't playing good, and nobody wanted me, so I started
talking to a recruiter. I actually was getting ready to sign the papers. I was eighteen my senior year. He
asked me if I had told my parents I was doing this. I said, no, my mom is full-blood Italian-I'm not going
to tell her until it's over with! He said, well I'm not going to let you sign until you at least let them know.
That night we had a game, Coach Gardner, who was the baseball coach here, and Coach Roberts, were
at the game. After that I remember sitting at the table after the game I had a pretty good game. I was
sitting at the table, really nervous to tell my mom because I knew she was probably going to hit me
(laughs.) The phone rang, and it was Coach Gardner. I talked to him and told the recruiter, and the
recruiter was actually really cool. He said, hey, go do your thing and if it doesn't work out, call me-we'll
still here. So I ended up playing baseball here for two years. My second year was when September 11
[2001] happened. I remember waking up-my dad was watching TV. My dad--I've seen him cry not even
a handful of times, but he was sitting there with this look on his face, and I said, what movie are you
watching dad. He said, this isn't a movie, bud. I watched the second plane go into the building. Then I
came to school and everybody was out in the hall watching the TVs, and we had practice that day, and it
just didn't feel right. I went to my mom's office, and I said, Mom, I'm going to join the Marine Corps.
Probably not what any mom wants to hear, but she said, she was calm, and she said, well honey, I
understand why you're upset, but-you made a commitment to your team. She raised me to honor my
commitments, so I finished the year out with the baseball team and decided to join afterwards. I
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remember the last game, we were playing in St. George. My dad said, do you want to stay and watch
the rest of the tournament? I said, no, we've got stuff to do. So we drove home. I gave Coach Gardner
a head's up on what was going on, but no, I wouldn't be back the next year. I drove home, walked into
the recruiter's office, and said, I want to join the Marine Corps, and I want to be in the infantry. They
said, slow down. So I had to go through the process of the ASVAB and everything.
CM: That's the test.
TM: Yes, that's the test. You take the test and it puts you where you want to be, and it’s funny, because
they like college guys. The Marine Corps is pretty tough to get in to. You can't have a GED, you have to
have a high school diploma. We have a little bit tighter rules than most of the other branches. I got in
there and took the ASVAB, and they put me in, they take you through a series of tests both mental and
physical, and you sit in a room and they say, OK, here's the list of jobs you can do. I looked at the list
and asked, is infantry on there? And they said, yes, and I said ok, and I slid it back to the liaison that was
there, and he said, no no, you don't understand, you don't need to do infantry. And I said, you don't
understand. If you don't put me in the infantry, I'll walk across to the Army-I bet they'll put me in. And
he smiled at me and said, you’re either incredibly brave or incredibly dumb, because you realize we're
going to be going to war soon, right? And I just looked at him and said, yes, is there any chance you can
get me over there? You know, I was young and cocky and not very smart. So he signed it and said, look,
I don't want you calling and crying to me when this is all over (laughs), and so I said, ok. So that's how
that went down.
00:10:20.1
CM: What time of year was this--what month would it have been, the following spring?
TM: It was May, around May time. So when I was there they gave me my ship date, which was
November 10, 2003.
CM: Where did you go to basic training?
TM: Camp Pendleton, out in California. The "Yellow Footprints." Took the bus. It was kind of an
experience. I'd never left home, you know, so that was my first real time leaving home. My parent saw
me off. The hardest part was having mom, and leaving. She was worried. Then they get you there, they
fly you down to Pendleton, you wait in a room for the drill instructors to get there, and then they come
in and just start screaming. And I remember the first night I was lying in bed going, what were you
thinking? You were going to school on a full ride scholarship and now. I won't tell you what they were
calling us, but it wasn't nice. You're there for thirteen weeks. The Marine Corps is the longest boot
camp. Thirteen weeks, well its actually fourteen-the first week they don't count, because you're in
receiving, that's where they give you the cool bald haircut, they kind of teach you what's to be expected,
you're at Camp Pendleton, or Parris Island, in North Carolina. Then you graduate boot camp, you get a
ten day leave where you get to come home, your family comes out when you graduate, and then you go
to whatever your MOS is, which is the Military Occupational Specialty. So mine was Infantry, so I went
to the School of Infantry right after.
CM: Where was that?
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TM: that was in California as well, just up the road from, it's called--I can't believe I forgot it. Pendleton
is a great big place, and the facility that the School of Infantry is in, the infantry are grunts. Grunts go to
the school of Infantry and the other guys go to-every Marine arrive, so they learn how to shoot basic
machine guns and basic infantry skills. With the School of Infantry they dig deeper into the Land Nav
(Land Navigation.) Even when you're done with SOI you're still pretty far from knowing anything.
CM: What does SOI mean?
TM: School of Infantry.
CM: And you said Land Nav?
TM: Land Navigation. They teach you just basic infantry tactics-how to patrol, they teach you basic
room clearing, they teach you how to shoot all the machine guns and stuff like that. They teach you
grenades, Claymore's and all that. The guys that aren't infantry go to what's called MCT-Marine Combat
Training, which is basic, basic infantry skills.
CM: This will probably sound stupid. How is the Marine infantry different from the Army infantry?
TM: The Marine Corps is a fighting force, the Army is an occupational force. So what usually happens is,
take Fallujah, for instance. We had the OP to go to Fallujah, we go into Fallujah, we take it over, and
then we hand it over to the Army.
CM: You go in first.
TM: Yes. And then in time of war it's supposed to be like that, but if the Army gets to a place that needs
clearing, they clear as well. We work hand and hand together. But the Marines usually get the less
desirable missions-well it depends on who you are talking to. But no, we all, we have a part. Sometimes
we need help, sometimes they need that.
CM: Thank you for explaining that. So, after you finished your schooling, where did you go first?
TM: I reported to Camp Williams, here, locally. I went Reserve. When I was in I told you the Recon
Indoc. Recon is the Marines special ops type thing. I wanted to do it, and I passed. My thing was I had
two years of school under my belt and I decided that I wanted to go be an officer. So that's why I
decided to go Reserve, because them I was going to get into the Marine Officers Candidate School-OCS.
Then when I got home with the Recon Indoc I passed it, and they said, ok, well, to do BRC (Basic
Reconnaissance Course) you need to go full active duty. I decided I would go finish schooling, go to the
Officer's Course and become an officer. But when I got home I was worried I was going to miss out on
the war. So, when my unit needed me to go to training. We were lucky, we got some different training
and stuff and so I stayed with the unit.
CM: In California?
TM: Here, in Utah. And we tried deploying, my buddy and I kept trying to deploy with other units that
were going out, but our unit wouldn't let us go because we were an LAR [Light Armored
Reconnaissance] unit--we're considered an operational unit, so at any given time that can make us go.
It's not like it’s an overnight thing-they give us time to get ready and stuff, but we're always, we're a
pretty good unit for people to have.
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CM: What does LAR stand for?
TM: Light Armored Reconnaissance. So I stayed here. We got to go to Africa, we got to go to the
Republic of Georgia and do some inter-training with the Moroccan Army and the Georgian army. Then
we got orders to Iraq. When we went to Iraq, they were asking for a PTT team--Police Transition Team.
I remember they were asking for volunteers to do this, and they said there will be a small team-thirteen
guys, they'll be separate from the unit, and they’re going to mentor and train and run OPS with the Iraqi
police. I looked at my good friend and said, what do you think, and he said, I'm not going with just
thirteen Marines. And so we didn't volunteer for it. Later that day we were out doing a machine gun
shoot and our gunny came over and said, that's cute you too. I said, what's that gunny? And he said,
you guys think you have a choice in this PTT team. And I said, we don't? He said, the team's already
made up, we just asked for volunteers for when people complain when they don't get on it. I said, ok.
He said, you two didn't volunteer, and I said, no. He said, well you're on it, and we said, ok. He said, are
you good with that? I said, does it matter (laughs)? He said, no. So we got put on that, which was
awesome, it was fun. I was a little nervous because it is a thirteen man team. Any time you leave the
base or anything you have very few Marines, but we got some really good training before we left. We
went to Iraq and ran those missions with the Iraqi police and tried to help those guys out, which was like
herding cats a lot of the time. It wasn't very good. But it was a fun deployment. I got pretty close with
the guys that got put on there.
CM: Were you in Baghdad?
TM: I was in Al Qa’im. Al Anbar Province. Al Qa’im was the main base we were on. We actually were on
a base called Camp Gannon. There's a fence and then Syria was right next to us. The first night we got
there my buddy came in, and he was white. I said, dude, what's wrong? He said, I just got shot at. I
said, no you didn't, dude, you just think you did. He said, no I got shot at. Then my buddy Jeff said, let’s
go fill the radios. Every so often, you've got to fill the radio so you can use the COMET--the complicated
system. So we went up to fill the radios and we turned on our headlamps and sure enough we started
getting shot at. We were, there were Hescos, so we were safe, but they were definitely shooting at us
from Syria. When they did, I grabbed my rifle, he grabbed his and we started to get up top to engage,
and there was a tower guard, a guard tower and he called it in and said we're taking fire from the east
wall. The officer, the COC is what we call it, said, do not fire. Where is it coming from? They said, Syria.
They said, stand down-do not fire. We are not at war with Syria. He said, but they are engaging us. He
said, it doesn't matter-stay down. He said, what do you recommend we do? He said, I recommend you
try not to get shot. We couldn't return fire to Syria. If it was coming from the Iraq side I think we would
have engaged. But we couldn't.
CM: It was probably still Al-Qaida, or who?
TM: It was the insurgents out in Iraq. Our area was-Ubaiti was part of our area, and Ubaiti was part of
the Baath party with Saddam loyalists, and they didn't like us too much. That area wasn't really fun to
be in. We knew that when we were going there we had to be a little more on alert and ready to go
because they didn't like us at all. It was one of those things. It was a good deployment. we were right
along the Euphrates River a lot of the time, which we had to cross bridges quite a bit, and I didn't like
crossing bridges-they kept blowing them up. But we worked with the Iraqi police as much as well. They
just didn't ever want to take over. They were happy with us being there, which that's why today with ISI
going and taking stuff. My dad said, what do you think? And I said, it shouldn’t take much. They didn’t'
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want to run their county, they didn't want to get control of it. Unfortunately, that was going to happen.
It's like, everybody wants to take out ISIS, but I've got news for them. If you take out ISI there's just
another terrorist group that takes over and you’ll be back where we were.
00:20:38.4
You know, it’s frustrating, and it was very frustrating when I heard that they took Fallujah over. I had a
good friend that did Fallujah, he was in the initial push--I had a couple of good friends there. We lost a
lot of Marines in Fallujah, just to have them come and take it over again. That is irritating. It's like I told
my buddy when they took it- well, no Marines died-we weren’t there. It gets old seeing marines and
soldiers and sailors and airmen coming home in boxes. I don't think we'll ever be able to turn that
country the way we'd like, the way the American people think it will be. They don't understand, and
that gets frustrating. They think, we should just go over there. There's no sense in going over there,
we're not going to change it. And Afghanistan is worse. We had a rude awakening when we got to
Afghanistan.
CM: Were the police officers just made up of civilians? Hadn't the American turned out all of the
previous police because they were Baathist?
TM: We would hold-part of our job was to hold recruiting for the police officers. So we'd do recruiting,
we'd take them through a scan, we'd check them out as well as we could. They don't have a lot of
records over there, it’s not like the United States. We'd basically see if they were terrorists, and we
didn't have much to go on. Unfortunately, lot of times the police there have a connection to get in--their
uncle or their brother is the chief of the police station or whatever, and he hires his friends and his
family. So they weren't very good-they were terrible. Part of our job was to get ammo expense reports
so we could get them more rounds, but we wanted to know where those rounds were going, and we
could never get that because they just don't understand. They refuse you-you ask for it, and they'd say,
oh, insha'Allah, which meant, God willing I'll get it to you. We’d say, well god better call in quick,
because I'm not giving you any more rounds. Insurgents are going to come, because they were getting
beat up by the insurgents pretty good too. But right before we left, our deployment was up, we found
out that we had a good portion of the police were part of the Mahdi Militia, which was a terrorist group
over there. It got pretty ugly about a month before we left.
So we found out they were part of the Mahdi Militia and we decided we were going to arrest them,
throw them up. We had a pretty good plan set in place. Unfortunately where we were going, it was a
compound with a serpentine get out. When the other police officers saw us getting their friends in the
truck, they all stood in front and we had a little face-off. There were more of them than us but we had a
lot bigger guns, so we ended up getting out of there. But it made sense why some things were
happening-why we'd find some IEDs why, ok, well that makes sense. It was tough. I never really trusted
them. I trusted the Marines, I didn't trust, even the guys that were really good guys, there was just
something about them that I doubted. We’re working together but, you stay in your box and I'll stay in
mine. But yes, we all came back. The deployment to Iraq actually wasn’t too bad. By the time we'd
gotten there-you still had things like phones were an issue, and showers. You were lucky to get a
shower. In fact me and my buddy-the enlisted guys didn't have showers but the officers did, and me and
my buddy finally said, screw this, we're going to shower in the officers’ shower, we're not wearing the
uniform when they go in there. We waited until real late at night to go in, and we thought we'd be fine.
Then six officers came in, and we thought, oh no, this isn't good. But we didn't get caught that day, but
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we got caught later in the deployment doing it. But it gets to the point where you say, OK, I need a
shower, I need to get this taken care of. But no, Iraq wasn't too bad, we had a good time--a good time
minus the food, and the conditions you’re in. It’s the guys you’re with that make it-we had a good team.
CM: How long were you there?
TM: In Iraq, we were there for about 8 months, a little over 8 months.
CM: And all in that one area?
TM: Yeah, our area was a pretty good sixed area. So Ubaiti was just a portion of it. We were in Usaba,
we were all over; our area was pretty good sized. So we were in charge of twelve Iraqi police stations
and then ten substations. So what we'd do is everyday we'd go out and check them, see what they were
doing, see if they had prisoners. Our corpsmen, if the prisoners were there--the prisoners would beaten
up sometimes--our corpsmen would patch them up. He’s also take care of the Iraqi police officers, see if
he could-because Marines don't have medics, we have navy corpsmen. So Doc would take care of the
Iraqi police officers. Then if we were driving and did a hit, and there were kinds or something, Doc
would help. We ran missions with the Iraqi police. We did a lot of missions in Iraq.
CM: And they were still just twelve of you?
TM: Yes, well, a lot of time not everybody would go. We usually would roll out with nine guys
sometimes. But that's just part of it. We were all kind of hand-picked out of it so everybody that was on
the team was pretty good at what they did, so we felt safe knowing that the guys knew what to do and
had good tactics. There was probably four or five of us who got really close, but I wasn't scared to do
anything with those guys.
CM: Were there ever any incidents where the Iraqi police were- we would hear a lot about Iraqi police
stations being bombed, and the men who were in line to sign up to become policeman would get killed.
TM: Yes, there were a couple of times when the police would be on post and somebody would pull up
and shoot them. They did get shot at quite a bit, the police stations did. They didn't really want to get
into it with us if we were there, so usually they would wait until we left, and we'd be back at base and
we'd hear, hey DQ8 just got hit, or DHQ just got hit, so we'd go out and investigate it and it would be
done. They got smart, they didn't really want to mess with the Marines. So they didn't want to test us
too much, but when we'd leave they would. We learned the hard way. The tribes down there are a big
thing. We sent three police officers to another police station, and they didn’t want to go but we thought
they didn't want to go because they were lazy. We went to that police station and asked, did they show
up? The said, no, and then two days later they said they had found some bodies. They took us out
there, and they had been shot execution style and then burned. Right away me and my buddy felt like,
crap, that was our bad. One of the guys in our unit-I won't use names-but he said, look at how good
they're doing, look at what they're doing! I said, "Gunny, they found all this stuff because they did it.”
Two months ago they had a truck-we got them brand new trucks, the US did. We gave them to them to
use as police trucks, and one of them just disappeared--drove out of their compound, they had no idea
where it was. I'm guessing he probably gave it to his brother-the chief there probably gave it to his
brother. We never found it, no trace found. I said, these guys had a truck stolen from their area, and
they have no idea where it went, but then they found the bodies, the murder scene and the weapons.
That was one thing that made me mad-the murder weapons was a 9 MM Beretta that was probably
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taken off of a soldier or Marine when we did the initial push through there. It was a US Beretta, and
that was one of the firearms that we carried. So that was kind of a "screw you" to us, giving us the
finger.
00:30:09.5
Once we learned that the tribes-and that's the thing that people here don't understand-it’s a hate that,
they'll kill you if you’re' just from a different tribe.
CM: And that goes back centuries.
TM: And it’s not going to change. They've got roads, but they don’t have a real good sewer system.
They don't have the things that we take for granted everyday-those people don't have. Refrigeration is
a big thing, they don't have that. There is a place called market Street where any given time of day you
can have 5-10,000 people on this one street getting groceries for the day. To think that they are going
to start thinking like us and doing what we do, they’re not. It’s a very uneducated country, both that
and Afghanistan, so what they are hearing is from the insurgents or the Taliban saying, this is what
America is, and they don't really have a clue. When we were in Afghanistan we were hitting rat lines
coming out of Pakistan, trying to take the supplies away from the Taliban-IEDs and weapons and drugs.
One of the first vehicles we stopped, we got them out of the car, and I said do you know who we are?
AND he said, yeah, you're Russian. And I said, what? No. Russia hasn't been here since the 1970s. But
he really thought we were Russian. And I said, no, we're American, through an interpreter, and he
looked at us funny and said, why are you here? He had no idea. But our area, Helmand Province, and
we're the furthest unit south in Afghanistan and the time, 2009-2010. We were the first unit-nobody
had ever gone further south than we had. They didn’t' have roads, they didn't have electricity. When
they turned a lamp or something on they would get batteries in a row and splice the wires and put them
on the end. That’s how they got light at night. So they really didn’t' know why we were there.
Afghanistan was a lot different, a lot different from Iraq. Better fighters, smarter fighters, and the
people weren’t as--in Iraq we'd get people who wanted to help us once in a while. IN Afghanistan they
didn't. They know we're going to be gone someday, and the Taliban, one thing I'll say about them, they
are good on their word. They say, they used to hang posters up saying, if you talk to the coalition forces,
we'll kill you. And they were good on their word-they would have.
CM: And they've been at war for a long time too.
00:33:01.5
TM: After a while you have to give them credit. In Afghanistan we had metal detectors where we'd
sweep for IEDs and we were finding a bunch of them. One day we found an IED that was non-metallic.
They had taken an ordinary IED, about a foot and a half wide, pretty easy to find. What they do is they
waterproof them by putting motorcycle tires on top of it, and then pound nails in-that's how we hit
them and get the high metallic hits on the metal detectors. We were sweeping one day when we found
the IED. The guy that was EOD [Explosive Ordnance Disposal] was out there with us, and he pulled it out
of the ground and said, this is a game changer. We can't detect this. We found it accidentally. We
found the battery source, we did find the actual plate. When they pulled it out of the ground it had
plastic around it. When we opened it up there were three notches in the top of it with, they were taking
Chinese batteries because there is a carbon fiber in the center of them. They're taking that carbon fiber
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out, put it in the notches, and then run a little thin piece of copper wire across with foam on the ends.
So that when you stepped on it your weight would have pushed the foam down which would have
touched the two wires together, which would have connected the circuit and blown up the IED. And we
had found it on accident. That was the time in the deployment when I thought, ok, my fun meter is
pegged (laughs.) I wasn't worried about getting shot or anything like that, but IEDs scared me, because
you couldn't see them, They are very good at making them, they are very good at setting them up,
because they don't have the technology we used, so they'd make it out of radio parts. You had to give
them credit because they were good. They blew up a lot of stuff,
CM: What were the years that you were in Iraq?
TM: Iraq, I was there from 2007-2008. I came home for about, I got married, I was engaged when I left
for Iraq to my wife, and then when we got home we got married that August. I went to the Police
Academy. I actually had a job in West Jordan before I left. My contract was up. My time, my contract
was up, they couldn't stop-loss me or anything, so I kept telling her, oh, honey I'm not going to go, I'm
not going to go. And then there were rumors-in the Marine Corps there are always rumors, you're
always going somewhere. And I just kept telling her, relax, we're not going anywhere. And then I got
the orders. So I told her, well I'm going to go turn my paperwork in, because my contract is up, they
can't make me go. And when I went there, and went to turn it in to the first sergeant. There were some
brand new guys there, and I said, you've got to hit numbers to deploy. Your unit has to have enough
numbers to go, and if you don't have those numbers, they'll get guys and help fill in. And like myself, a
lot of the guys were getting out. They said, hey, we just got back from deployment less than six months
ago, they have wives and families and jobs that they needed to stay back for.
So I saw these new guys, and I looked at the first guy and asked, who are they? He said, that's who is
going to Afghanistan with us with another list from a couple other units that they were bringing. And I
just sat there and said, first, we need to talk. So we went in his office, and I said, if we're going to be
operating, you guys are going to need me. But if you're going to be guarding a base, if you're just going
to be base security, I don't need to go. I said, I need to see exactly what we're doing. He said, Meranda,
I can't tell you that. I said, first off, I have a secret clearance. So he showed me where we were going,
and I said, I'm going to go to lunch, and I went to lunch and I just couldn't bring myself to turn in my
paperwork. So I went back and I said, all right, first off, here's the deal. If my wife asks, I don't have a
choice. I have to go. He said, ok. Driving home when I was getting ready to tell her a lie, it was the only
way I could think to do it. And then when I walked through the door I just couldn't. She would have
known. She was cooking dinner and looked around the corner and said, hey babe. I said, hey. She went
back and she said, you didn't turn your paper work in, did you? I said, no, I didn't. She was quiet and I
said, are you mad at me? She said, I'm not mad, I knew what I married when I married you. But
promise me this is our last one. I said, it will be.
Then I went back to the unit. A lot of my buddies thought I was getting out, so they were asking, what
are you doing? I said, I can't let you guys go out there without me.
CM: So they were still in.
TM: Yeah, a couple of guys got out, but four or five of my really good friends were going, and that's
another reason. You don't want your buddies going without you. I said to my wife, honey, you don’t
want me here if they're there. I've got to go with them. So we ended up training and going.
10
CM: What year is this?
TM: 2009-2010. We actually landed in Afghanistan. It was kind of ironic, because it was the day my
contract was done, November 10. I remember laughing with my buddy, saying, if this isn't a kick in the
nuts I don't know what is! (Laughs). I said, it’s ironic that this is the day that my contract is officially
done. It was just funny.
We had a good unit, Charlie Company, all the guys in there were really good guys, the enlisted guys.
We were all pretty close, we all knew each other’s families. I was excited to go with the unit because
the first time the unit went to Fallujah we got separated and I went away, so this was my first
deployment with the unit. It was fun, being with the guys. But it's nerve-wracking. You know your
buddies are going out on patrol, so you’re kind of waiting and checking in on how they're doing. When
they come back, that's the best time in the day, when you see all your buddies come back and they're
ok. Marines are never going to act like that, but they all did it.
CM: What was your job, what were you there for, your mission.
TM: Our mission, our mission was to take ground from the Taliban. We were supposed to cut down
their area of operation by taking land.
CM: In Helmand Province?
TM: In Helmand Province, and we were supposed to push further south and set up another base. So we
started doing Census ops [operations] in a town called Dibrak, Thogats and Pay Banader, which it was
just kind of working our way down towards toward Sar Banader. One of the key places we wanted to go
to was a place called Bahram Cha. Bahram Cha had me nervous because it was a bad place. It was
scary, and then also they were talking about OPS in Marjah going on there. Marjah was a big OP in
Afghanistan too at the time. And I didn't know until I got home in 2009-2010 were the most deadly
years for US casualties in Afghanistan. It was different-it was a different beast. The guys that had been
on deployment in Iraq thought, oh we're good, and then we get there and we're like, holy crap! It's not
even in the same ball game. But we worked through it. We adapted and we started pushing forward.
00:41:08.9
And then we did the Census ops [Census operations.] Census ops, basically what we do is we go into the
neighborhood and we know who lives here and here, and the more you stay in the town the more you
can understand the town and the more you'll see when something is out of place. So, we tried to stay
there, to have a presence in those towns all the time. We'd always be respectful. I told my Marines
when we're going to search a house, you always ask, ask permission. Let this guy save face in front of
his family. We're going to search it regardless, but let him save face. There weren't very many times
that we were told no, you can't search. I mean, we've got fifteen marines that are geared up, you're not
going to win that fight. So they'd let us in. But one thing we had to make sure we did is we couldn't
single one person out, so if we wanted to talk to one guy, we had to talk to the entire neighborhood.
Because if you target one guy, the Taliban is watching, and if you target that guy, that guy is going to
disappear, he’s going to be gone. And so we had to be very careful about that. Like I said, in
Afghanistan, people didn't want to help us very much. Not that they were really helpful in Iraq, but
Afghanistan-we went in and talked to a village elder one time. I said, through my interpreter, because
they speak Pashtu there -and they teach us basic language stills, just enough to get you into trouble. I
11
said, have you seen Taliban? It was always, no no, we haven't seen then for eighteen months-everything
was eighteen months. We haven’t' seen them for eighteen months. We always talked to the
village elder-every village has an elder, and you talk to then, he's kind of like that guy-
CM: The mayor.
TM: Yes. And I said, well we're going to be here, we're going to be talking to your people. And right as I
said that, an IED went off. And I turned around--we'd driven around a little mountain, a little hill, and
that's where the IED had gone off. I looked at my guys and said, get him in the vehicle, let’s go check it
out. We go out there, and there were three dead guys in a hole. They were trying to put an IED in
before we left, because they were going to take the same route out. So I got him out and I said, I
thought you didn't have any Taliban around here. You know, I felt bad for the people because I think
they do want help, but they’re not guaranteed we're going to be there forever, and if they help and we
leave- leave them and their family, I mean they will kill the entire family. So you couldn't get too mad-you
get frustrated because they know where the IEDs are, especially when one of your guys gets hit by
one and killed. It makes you mad, because that could have been prevented, somebody could have told
something somewhere and he wouldn't have died. So it does make you mad.
But it was like, I guess the first OP we were getting ready to go on as a company, we're doing a
companywide OP; we're meeting at a place called North Station. We'd gotten there, we're out of our
vehicle, we're kind of hanging out, waiting for the other vehicles to get there, and we heard a big
explosion. I just kind of shook my head, and my buddy Mike, he was our EOD guy-Mike Morata-I looked
at him and he just shook his head, and one of the new guys goes, what was that? I said, somebody just
found an IED. So of course we're listening to the radios because they'll send information over and then
they send over the IED 9 line, and the next thing you're praying that you don't hear a Medivac 9 line.
First OP, first week we were there. It was just like, wow, what did we just walk in to? Everybody was
fine, nobody was hurt. It destroyed the vehicle, but the guys were safe. They were lucky they had a
very experienced Marine that was attached to our unit--his name was Sergeant Sandlin, one of my good,
good friends. In fact he might be using to Utah soon, hopefully. He was there, and he took over the
situation. And what was bad is we had brand new officers that didn't know anything. One was a stud-he
was really good. But I finally had to tell him, you need to start listening to your Marines; your
sergeants and corporals have been in the Marine Corps a lot longer than you have. You don't know
what you're doing. I get it, you're the officer, and you’ve got to be in charge; but let them make you
look good. And Sandlin wasn't the type to let people push him around, even an officer. And so Sandlin
took charge of the situation and got them out of there. He was one of the best friends I served with.
CM: Sandlin?
TM: But that was the first OP we went on. What was bad is that the guys that I was on the PTT Team
with they split us up immediately, because they figured that our experience could help other units. We
understood, but we wanted to be together, and so it was tough because they were, one was in 1st
Platoon, and two were in 3rd Platoon, and then I was in Headquarters, and so I would try to make my
way to them. They were on two different bases, so we had North Station and South Station, and then
our main base. I was on the main base because I did the intel, the BATS machine, which is the
Biometrics Animated Tool Set. It's a camera that, when we come in contact with Afghanis we scan their
irises, take a picture of their face, their fingerprints and make a dossier. That way, if we come across a
fingerprint on a weapon or IED we could go back in and see detainees site. We'd upload that, that way if
12
you went out and scanned the iris, it would come up and you could get him. So I was at the main base
for having that, but we ran a ton of OPS with those guys. I was always consistently calling and checking.
Any time you get to see your buddies was a good day, making sure they were all right, them making sure
you are all right. So we were busy doing all that. We had to cross the Helmand River quite a bit, which
wasn't fun in those big vehicles. The LAV [Light Armored Vehicle] is an amphibious vehicle. It’s got the
four wheels and it floats, it floats but not very fast. It still gets you nervous going across a large--like,
this thing can't float. And I hated crossing the Helmand. But it was necessary.
CM: Is it a big river?
TM: In the summertime, when we first got there in the fall it wasn't, but once the snow was melting and
we start getting the run off it raised and widened. We ended up sinking a LAV in the river because-it's a
long story, but I actually gave the Forwards report and told them, you can't cross. It wasn’t' a matter of
floating, the current was going too fast. So once it starts floating the current will take the front of that
vehicle and push it and you're going wherever god takes you. So I told them no, don't do it. Well
somebody with more rank than me who was the CO decided, he doesn't know what he's talking about.
Never mind the fact that I'd been in LAR [Light Armored Reconnaissance] for my entire career. He sent
the vehicle over and we ended up sinking it to the bottom of the river. But the Helmand River, that's
how the, the Afghani people are very amazing. They would take and trench from the river to water their
gardens. They work their butts off, when they weren't making IEDs.
So it was kind of amazing to see them out there, farming. Most of them would farm poppies; that's
where most of the world's heroin comes from, is Afghanistan, and the Taliban basically tells them you're
going to grow this, and it’s not illegal. Between poppies and marijuana. the first night OP we were doing
(laughs) we had our NVGs on (night vision goggles) and we were walking through, and I said, man I know
that smell, what is that smell? I couldn't put my finger on it. Now I will say this, and most people may
laugh, but I've never done drugs before. I have friends who dabbled in it.
CM: But you know what it smells like (laughs.)
TM: Exactly! So I’m walking, and I say, what is that smell, I know that smell, And then that day, we're
walking through ,and could see, and I'm like, oh. We're talking football fields of marijuana, just tons of
it. And then of course we took a lot of drugs--the first time we found drugs in the back of a car we took
ninety-two bags of black tar heroin out of the back of this truck. So we took a lot of drugs off the street.
We took a lot of weapons off the street, and we pushed the Taliban back pretty good.
CM: I was going to ask you-did you accomplish your mission in terms of gaining some ground?
TM: Yes and No. I mean we were in Divolac, we cleared that place. We cleared Bagat, and then we
went to a town called Sar Banader. We shouldn't have been there that early. We skipped Pay Banader.
But he Marine unit that was just above us was getting in firefights consistently in Sar Banader and so our
CO wanted to go there.
00:50:55.2
He didn't do any prep work for it or anything, and we went in, we inserted into the town, March 1, 2010.
We talked to the village elder, and that's when the first IED went off. It killed Lance Corporal Olson who
also was from Orem, went to Mountain View. AND then for the next two days was just not fun.
13
Clearing houses, trying to find intel out there. Then March 3rd they were pulling us out and taking us
back and the other platoon was taking over. The vehicle that was leading them, the EOD one, it’s got
mine sweepers on it so they can catch the IEDs-they are actually made to blow up. It broke down, so
they told us, Black Three, you guys take lead, which was my vehicle. And I don't remember much, this is
all third party from my driver, but it was the same road we had taken out as we took in. I guess I had
gotten on the radio and told our gunny, hey get off, we can't take this route, and he was on it because
we were towing that other vehicle back and we couldn't really go on open terrain towing a vehicle, and I
said, we need to find another spot. My driver offset the vehicle, instead of being in the right lane
instead of the left lane, and thank god he did that because we all would have died if he hadn't. The IED
went off-like I said, I don’t remember much, I remember waking up in the helicopter. I kept my calm
pretty good. When you wake up in a Black Hawk you know something bad has happened. I looked
around and yelled for the medic and he said, Sergeant, you're awake. I asked, what happened? He said,
Sergeant, you guys hit an IED. And I said, are my Marines OK? MY first concern is, is everybody alive?
He said, yeah, your gunner, your vehicle commander and your gunner are in the bird behind us. You’re
worse off. I guess I was having seizures, and I was throwing up a lot, bleeding, I don't remember. And I
was just like, whoa.
Then when he told me that everybody is ok, I asked, do I have my legs? He said, yeah, you've got your
legs. Can you move them for me? They had me in a C collar (cervical collar) and everything, and IVs
coming down. I sat there and asked, are they moving? And he said, just hang tight, sergeant. So I knew
something was wrong. They got me to the hospital, I remember being cold because they cut my
cammies off me in the field, and I was freezing. It was really cold in the hospital, they rushed me in. And
they were doing checks and stuff, checking for internal bleeding, I’m guessing and stuff like that. And
one of the doctors said, do you have to go to the bathroom? And I said, I don't know. So they took a 16
gauge needle and stuck it right underneath my belly button and pulled out the urine in my bladder,
because they'd been giving me IVs. And I yelled at them, and I looked down and I had track marks, I
looked like a heroin addict. The guy said, I'm sorry man, you were so dehydrated I couldn't get a vein. I
said, ok. They took me into the x-ray room. They don't have MRIs in country. Then they pulled me out
and there were a lot of people rolling into the hospital that night, I remember. They said, we're going to
get back to you. I said, go ahead, because there was a guy that came in who was in bad shape. I said,
you just take care of hi, I'm fine here in the corner. Once they realized my back wasn't broken, they left
the C Collar on me. I'm not a very good patient, and it was bugging me, so I took it off. I said, nothing's
broke, I don't need this (laughs.) Then the guy came over, and said, we need to put this back on. I said,
you're not putting that back on. Then they took me into a tent and that's where I stayed.
Obviously, you're kind of lying there looking at your legs, going, what the crap is going on? Luckily for
me one of the doctors there was a back specialist in the States, and he came in and said, look I don't
want to give you false hope, I don't want to say you're going to be fine, but I don't think it’s as bad as
you think. He said he could feel my discs because they were so swollen from the over pressure of the
blast and the concussion. He said, hang in there. He didn't want me getting down in the dumps, and
honestly, I was never concerned about it. When you do that, I kind of expected something was going to
happen. I had a feeling before I left on deployment that something was going to happen. Because you
can fill out your will to who gets your remains and stuff, and I’d never done that on any previous
deployments. But this one was a little different. This one felt a little different. So I made sure I had all
my ducks in a row before I left. I remember talking to my wife and I was explaining bills to her. She
14
wasn't paying attention, and I said, Damn it honey, when I die you have to take care of this! It was just a
slip. And she looked at me and said, what did you just say? I think in my mind I kind of expected
something to happen, so when it happened I wasn't---is this the worse that's going to happen?
So they put me in my room and I started to doze off, and they came in and woke me up and said, you
might need to call your wife. She got a phone call from Headquarters Marine Corps and you might want
to call her. I said, yes, good idea. So they put me in a wheel chair, they took me outside and I got on the
satellite phone, and she was at work with my dad and my sister. I was kind of embarrassed to call
because I'd gotten hurt, and so I called and the girls at the salon said, Oh, she's not here, she's busy and
she’s going to go home early, can I take a message. I said, well, this is TJ. They couldn't really hear me
because I was on the satellite phone. So they got her, she got on the phone and started crying. I said,
honey, get my dad and my sister on the phone, I'm only telling you guys this story once.
They all got on, I said look, I had a bad day at work, I'm in the hospital, I’m fine, I’m doing ok. I'm getting
some good chow. I tried to get them to not worry. But they all started crying, and I said, look, I'm not in
the mood to listen to this, I got to go. My dad said, bud, make sure you call your mom. So I called my
mom and let her know I was ok, and then I hung up and the airman who was with me started to take me
back in the hospital, and he says, Sergeant, you didn't tell them that you can't feel your legs. I wasn't in
a good mood, and I said, well I think when I wheel my happy butt off an airplane they're going to figure
it out, don't you? So they took me back, put me back in bed. The next day they had a sheet going up,
and they were asking me, can you feel this, can you feel that? I finally yanked the sheet down and they
had needles going down my legs, and I said, I can't feel them, get them out! I had a concussion, I blew
out both my eardrums. And so I was still in pretty bad shape. That’s why they didn't want to transport
me right away because they didn't know if I could do well on an airplane or what. About a week later I
yelled for the Doc, maybe it was less than a week, but I yelled for the Doc, and I said, hey, I'm feeling
something in my feet.
So what was happening is my discs started going back to normal size. Four of them were really bad, but
we couldn't tell because there was no MRI. So when I started taking pressure off my spinal cord and all
my nerves back there, I started feeling. Once I started getting feeling I said, hey, what's wrong with my
knee? They said, what knee? I pulled it up and I had a bruise going down from my groin down to my
ankle, it was this knee, and they just went, oh gosh, and they rushed me into the emergency room.
Doctors were running everywhere, and I finally said hey, what's going on? They said, you have fluid on
your knee and if we don't get it off, it can get infection in there and a good chance you'll have to
amputate. They said, why didn't you tell us your knee was hurting? I said, I didn't know my knee was
hurting until today. So they went in and took out a lot of blood and fluid. When I got blown up, I'd
flown out of the vehicle, but my knee had kept me from actually leaving the vehicle; my leg was still in
the vehicle.
1:00:20.4
Then the next day after we got blown up was March 4-March 3 I got blown up, March 4, I looked over.
One of the Marines there that didn't come over was in the hospital. I said, Louis, what are you doing
here, and he said, we were in an IED too, Sergeant. I asked if everybody was ok. He said, Olson is dead.
Nigel Olson was also from Mountain View, from Orem and went to Mountain View. So within a matter
of four days there were three of us just from Orem that all went to Mountain View that were all hurt-two
were killed, I was wounded. Of course, because of that, my mom--my mom and dad knew that if
15
reporters-I never thought it would happen, but I said, if reporters are taking information, don't tell them
anything, it can get me in a lot of trouble. And my mom didn't know much, she didn't know where we
were in Afghanistan. You can't tell them that. You can say, hey. I am in Helmand Province, but you can't
pinpoint it.
So my legs started feeling better after they drained it and everything. About a week after that I was
laying in my bed, happier because I was feeling better, like they were going to send my back. I was
hurting, my back was killing me, my knee was killing me, but I thought, I can still go back. They came
and pointed and said, him, him, and him are going to Germany tomorrow. I sat up and looked at the kid
next to me and said, did he point to me? He said, yeah, and I said, no, I’m not going to Germany.
Because if you go to Germany you're going home. So I went to the front desk and asked to see my
medical records, because you need those to leave. I said, I don’t even know what's going on with me,
can I see them? And they handed them to me, and I grabbed them, went to my rack and thought, ok, I
need cammies, I can't go out looking like this. And I looked down the row and there's a guy with his
cammies sitting there, so I took his cammies. I found a backpack, I put my medical records in the back
pack and I went out the back door. I'm like, ok, to fly, to get on an airplane you have to have a flak
jacket and a Kevlar. So I went to Supply so I could get a new flak jacket and a Kevlar so I could get out of
there, and I actually found one on a Humvee. They were in the PX and he just took it and laid it on top
so I took the SAPI [small arms protective insert] plates out of it and grabbed the Kevlar and started to
crutch my way to the flight line and the sergeant major found me and said, do you need a ride? I said,
Sure, and I got in and said, oh no, this isn't good. Sergeant Major is going to kill me. He knew something
was up because he asked me what my name was and I told him Meranda but I wasn't wearing cammies
that said Meranda on them. He just told me when we got there, this ride never happened.
So I got on the helicopter and flew back to my unit and got in a lot of trouble, a lot of trouble. The worst
part was having to call my wife when I got there. The Headquarters Marine Corps called her and told
her that her husband will be in Germany in two days. And so when I called her she said, how’s
Germany? I said what, how did you know about Germany? So I told her, I said babe, I'm actually back
with the unit. She was dead quiet. I said, honey are you there? She said, yeah, I'm here. I said, are you
mad? When she calls me Meranda I’m in trouble, and she said Meranda, don't lie to me! Did you leave
the hospital or did you get released. I said, I left. I called her right when I got there, so I hung out. Four
hours later I'm standing in front of my CO and my XO and my tank commander getting yelled at, and
Sergeant Major Cottle finally stepped in and said, what are you doing here, Meranda? I said, sir, if I
leave, nobody knows how to do the BATS machine like I do, and nobody knows how to fly the UAV like
me. I was the UAV pilot for our unit also.
CM: What does that stand for?
TM: Unmanned Aerial Vehicle. So it’s a smaller one, it’s not like the big ones you see on TV, it’s more
for like surveillance like that. But it’s a good piece of gear to have when you're there. He said, ok,
you've got two weeks. How long will it take you? I said, it will take me about a month and a half for me
to train someone out, because that's all we had left in country. And he said, we have two weeks.
So I trained a couple of the Marines up on how to do it, gave them crash courses so they could at least
operate it. My hope was that they would leave me there, but I realized that once I got home, I was still
on crutches, I couldn't walk without crutches. They ended up sending me home, and I was in trouble,
and the CO was telling me, it’s not over when we get back, you’re done. Sergeant Major Cottle told me,
16
as long as I'm around nothing is going to happen to you. When I finally land in Germany--it took about
two or three days to get there, and the chaplain was there, I wasn't in the mood to talk to him. He was
following me around- it was about March 21, 2010, same month just a couple of weeks later. He kept
taking me around and he was with me all day, and I didn't understand what he was doing. I kept telling
him, if you've got something else to do you can go do it-trying not to be rude.
They finally took me to my room at the hospital in Germany where I was going to stay because of the
concussion, because I had fluid on my brain. Usually when you get a concussion it will go away and mine
wasn't going away- it was getting worse, so it was a concern. They took me to my room, and he said, do
you want to go get something to eat? I said, sir, I just really want to be left alone. I’ve been trying to get
rid of you all day, but if you'll just leave me alone, I’d appreciate it. He said, ok, but I just wanted to say
I'm sorry to hear about your Sergeant Major. I said, what happened to Sergeant Major? He said, you
don't know? I said, I've been flying for two days-no. He said, Sergeant Major Cottle was killed in an IED
yesterday. Right after you leave you hear about more of the Marines getting hurt. I was mad, I was
angry- I understood why I had to go home, but I didn’t want to. I couldn't have done anything to help
them, I was more of a handicap to them than anything, but you just want to be there with the guys. If
I'm going to be hurting I'd rather be hurting there than sitting at home. I was in Germany for a little
while and then they sent me to California, and eventually brought me home. Which my wife was happy
about, but I wasn't.
Then I tried to reenlist, I tried to stay in. But because my back- I've got four herniated discs, and then
you have sacs in between your disks, I don't know the medical terms for them. But the sacs were
punctured, so they deteriorated, so it’s bone on bone. I lost the hearing in my left ear, and tore my ACL-my
meniscus in my left knee. So I was in bad shape, and that's why they, when I got denied, the first
time they told me I got denied reenlistment, he just kind of looked at me and said, Meranda, you're
hurt, you're a grunt, you can't do that anymore. I was upset but I understood. It was hard because eight
and 1/2 years of your life, just gone. I miss it, I miss it but I don't. I've got a wife and my son. My sons
Trip and Crew, and I don't know if I could leave them. I don't know how my buddies did it that had kids.
I've got more respect for them now that I have kids, but I don't know if I could have done that.
CM: I'm glad you made it home safely despite your injuries.
TM: Thank you.
CM: So you're not in the Reserves or anything.
TM: No. the day I came home--they have to give you so long to get done. They were going to try to give
me a medical discharge, and I didn't want that. I wanted an honorable discharge. A medical discharge is
still honorable, but I didn’t want a medical discharge. The one guy kept trying to talk me into it, saying,
you get full benefits and you get money every month. I said, I did eight and 1/2 years of multiple
combat tours, I want an honorable discharge, I want that paper. I don’t want a medical discharge. I was
adamant about it. I said, you’ve got to give me six months. So I had the surgeries done, and I had to
sweet talk my back doctor. I said, look, just play with this, here's the deal. I know I can't go out and do
what I used to do. But, I got to get out, you've got to get me off so I can get out. And he reluctantly did,
and said, if I find out that you didn’t get out, I'm going to be upset. I said, you're good. I can't stay in
anyway. So he signed the note saying I could return to full duty. The next day I went up to the unit, and
gave our corpsman the note to return to full duty, and turned in my gear. That night I sat in my uniform
17
until 12 o'clock. I just didn't want to take it off. My wife understood. She -our entire marriage to that
point, I’d been gone with those guys. I got lucky with the person I married because most people, with
the weird stuff that you have when you come home, and the PTSD, the wives don't get enough credit for
what they go through as well. I told her, I'm not the same person; you need to go. She said, I'm not
going anywhere. She's woken up to some interesting things, and weird quirks that I have now. I think,
she never got jealous, which a lot of wives will because when you're with your wife, you're with your
wife, and then when you're with your buddies that you went to war with, it’s a lot different. A lot of
times, my buddies knew more about me than she did. I lived with them longer than I lived with her. But
she never got jealous, she always just appreciated that I had those relationships. In fact they, one of her
friends was asking, they said something about, when TJ came home from Afghanistan. She looked at
them and said, he never really came home from Afghanistan. It’s hard. I don't watch the movies, like
that one, American Sniper. When he shot that Jordanian sniper from the insurgents, we were actually in
country at the same time as he was. We weren't in the same area, but we had heard about it, it was
kind of cool, oh yeah. When people ask, have you seen it, I say, no, I was there, I know what it was like.
I don't need to see movies to show me. I don’t really like those, they stir up emotions.
1:11:59.2
And then the coming home was really cool. For the most part people are really appreciative and thank
you all the time, which I know I wasn't real big on. My buddies weren't, they don't like it that much.
They appreciate it but it makes us feel dumb.
CM: Kind of embarrassing?
TM: But I remember having a class here when I first got here, and the one kid called me "George Bush's
puppet," and I had some words with him. It can make you mad, but that's kind of why we did what we
did, so they can think like that. They don’t have to like what I did. I didn't like what I did sometimes.
(Laughs.) That’s why America is so good, you can have your opinion and not get prosecuted for it.
CM: What do you think about America’s role today? Should we be involved in what is going on in Syria
or other places?
TM: Honestly, I don't know. I like that we help other countries, but I think we need to work on ours too.
I think we need to focus on our country a little bit too. Because we've got some things we need to fix
here. In the Middle East, I hate to say it, but the most violent-the only thing that violence understands is
greater violence. And we can't do it half-baked. We can't go in half-assed and try to help. We either go
in full on and do it or we stay out of there because if we go in half-baked it’s just going to get Americans
killed. To be honest I’m tired of Americans dying in that god-forsaken country. And if we go over there
will it change anything? Probably not. We might take out ISIS and the insurgents. But there’s just going
to be the next group waiting to take their spot. I think we could do a lot by not putting anybody on the
ground. We've got pretty awesome technology these days. We can locate and take them out, but I
don’t know if we're ever going to change that. Like I say, I'm tired of military guys dying. But that's what
our jobs are, so whatever the president decides to do I'll support. We voted him in for a reason, and
hopefully they make the best decision, him and the Congress.
CM: What would you say to an incoming freshmen or a high school aged student who might be
interested in exploring joining the military?
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TM: The military isn't for everyone. There were some guys that we were in with who did it because
they're mad at their dad or whatever. And if you do it because you don't want to do it, it would be
worse than prison, it really would. You’re treated like a child, you're told what to wear, where to be,
when to be there, all that stuff. I loved it, my buddies loved it, but we joined wanting to do it. It wasn't
something where we just woke up one day and said, you know what, I think I'm going to be a Marine. It
was always in us. So I would say, if it’s something that you've always thought about and wanted to do,
then do it. If it’s something you're going to do because you've broken up with your girlfriend, or you
don't have anything else going on--I heard that a lot, I don't have anything else going on, don’t do it,
because you'll hate it. Realistically, if you don’t want to go there and try to be--all my buddies wanted to
be the best, we always wanted to one-up each other. And we're good at our jobs. If you don't want to
do that, you're going to be one of those guys that we have to look after. And then if you do go in, go in
to something that you can--being in the Infantry with the Marine Corps, when you get out, yes you get
leadership skills and stuff like that--all the recruiters are like, what can you bring? Well, my job, nothing
to this one (laughs.) I've got leadership skills, I guess. Unless you need a room cleared, I'm your guy, but
unfortunately not a lot of jobs require that.
CM: What was your ultimate rank?
TM: Sergeant, an E5 Sergeant.
CM: Is there anything else you'd to add?
TM: No, no. One thing that people don't understand is that Hollywood has kind of screwed us military
guys over with PTSD. We don't want to fight and kill everybody, and it is a definite problem that's going
on with veterans. The only thing that saved me, because I was one of those guys that ‘didn't have a
problem’-I didn't need to go talk to anybody, when I came back. And then I had some instances at home
that happened. What really changed me was, my wife came to me and showed me a pregnancy test,
and I realized that it wasn't fair for her or my kids to be like that-I had to start working on it. Because
you think you're normal when you come home. You think it’s normal to check the locks fifteen times at
night; it’s normal to go to a restaurant and sit in a corner and count people and act weird. And it’s not
that we're crazy, we're being cautious, we're [using tactics.]
CM: It’s drilled into you.
TM: Yes, we're trying to do tactics with everything we do in our life because that's how we had to do it.
It’s not something that you can just shut off. And my family, my mom and dad and my sister, they knew
I was different, but they didn't want to tell me because they didn't want to hurt my feelings. My dad
said, bud, you get set off pretty easy now. And I didn’t realize I was doing that. That was hard, one of
the hardest things, that I had done that to my family-my wife and my mom and dad and sister. And
that's when I said, ok, I've got to fix this, this isn't right. But military guys--just be smart about questions
that, if you run into them, that you ask. A lot of people ask really dumb questions. I had a kid that told
me he knew what I was going through. My wife and I were in Blockbuster when it was open still. He
said, Yeah, I know what you are going through. I thought, oh, maybe he's in the service. He said, I play
Call of Duty and it’s pretty lifelike. I just turned around and looked at him. I had just gotten home from
Afghanistan, and I was on crutches. I think the look on my face was, I'm going to grab you by the neck!
And my wife finally made me go outside. That kid was being serious! Call of Duty! Ok, man. The
veterans, they appreciate everything everyone has done for them, and continue to do, but it is out
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there. If they know of a vet that's having a hard time, try to get him to go get help, because it’s terrible
that they survive combat and then they’re coming home and they can't survive real life. That's hard to
see and hear about. I wish that I could do more to help guys like that. It’s hard to get to them because
they don't want help, they don't want help.
CM: Are you affiliated with any, like the school has a Veterans Club and there are veterans’
organizations in the public.
TM: I went to a couple of things like that when I first got home, and it was good, but there was always a
lot of, "thank you for your service," and I didn't want it to be about me. The Wounded Warrior Project
contacted me quite often. I felt pretty lucky, I feel really fortunate. Yeah, it sucks I got blown up, but
there are a lot of guys who are ten times worse than me, and who are doing a lot worst, and those are
the guys who need that kind of stuff. And I told them, I appreciate what you're doing, but you should
find another veteran. And I appreciate when people say thank you, but at the same time I'd just as soon
be in the corner and have them honor someone else.
CM: Don’t want to call attention to yourself.
TM: Yes, so I don't affiliate with stuff like that that much anymore, because I just felt awkward. My
buddies and stuff, that's why I like them, because they make fun of me more than anything, and I need
that. They keep me grounded, and my family does too. My little sister Jen. Honestly I like to stay home
now, and hang out with family. I've got a niece and a nephew, Neil and Rome. Rome is my oldest son's
age, and I just try to enjoy being with family more. My boys keep me pretty busy, so that's kind of my
release, when life starts getting-because, no matter what you're doing, you can try all day not to think
about it, but you’re always going to go back to thinking about. Once I finally realized it is just who I am
going to be from now on, it’s not ever going to go away, I just have to learn how to control it. So when
something triggers it and I'm having a rough time, I go and hold my son and play with my boys and give
my wife a hug, because I was so close to not having that opportunity to do all that. I try to live the best
that I can for my buddies that died. I've got a lot of Marines, so when things are getting tough I give
them a call, vice versa, and they call me, and we don't talk about anything important, we just talk. I
don't know if it’s just hearing their voices, it just makes me feel, ok, you're good, and I think they know
that I call them for that reason, and they call me for that reason.
CM: So that I have all the information, you have a Purple Heart, and what other medals?
TM: Man, all my medals. The Marine Corps Achievement medal, all the ribbons that you get when you
deploy, I can get you a list, but I don't know them right off the top of my head.
CM: No, that's ok.
TM: Ribbons always made me upset, because officers, two officers in particular, were all about getting
ribbons. People die for people to get ribbons.
CM: I just wanted you to be able to say what was important to you if that was important to you.
TM: No, the only ribbon that I cared about was the National Defense ribbon, and that' the only one I
wore for a long time, until my wife finally told me, go get your medals, go get your ribbons. Ribbons,
there are a lot of guys that deserve them a lot more than what they get. I can think of four or five
Marines off the top of my head who deserve some pretty good awards, but they were enlisted, so. And
20
then you see other people get awards, and you were there when it happened, and you think, that is not
how it went down. He did not do that. But, you can't stop it, they are officers, you know? It’s just like,
whatever. So yes, ribbons, I do have my ribbons in a shadow box, but they weren't that important to
me.
CM: What were you studying here at UVU, and did you finish? Will you finish?
TM: I'm doing public relations. I started, when I came back I came back into it. I had a kid, kept doing it,
had another kid, and started moving up in work.
CM: Where do you work?
TM: I work at Cardwell Distributing. Bill Ross is the owner of Cardwell, and his son Jeff Ross is my best
friend who was my driver in Iraq. When we went to Afghanistan, he sent me package after package, and
he knew I was in law enforcement, and I had gotten a job at West Jordan [Police Department.] But
when I got home and I was on crutches, West Jordan [Police Department] was like, hey, man, we can't
take you. And so I was still on orders, but I was getting ready to get off orders, and I was thinking, what
am I going to do. I just happened to stop in to say hi, and thank him for sending me packages, because
he knew when we were being deployed what we'd need. His packages were awesome, because he'd
already done it once. Anytime I saw Bill Ross on there I got excited, and Paula, his wife, because they
are like another mom and dad to me. You’d open it up and there was all the stuff you needed, so I was
pretty stoked about it.
I just stopped in to tell him thank you. And he said, I want to offer you a job. We’ve got this thing going
on with the Shell Line distributor and we're going to be in charge of the Jiffy Lubes. I'm not the type that
likes handouts. The first time I said thanks, Bill, but no thanks. I turned around and left. He called me
back in, and he said, look, I’ve got to hire somebody to do this job. Go home, and I’m going to send you
an email with an offer, let me know if you'd like it. I said, ok. So driving home I'm thinking, what else
are you going to do? You're getting off orders, you don't have a job; dude, you need a job! So when I
got home I looked at the email and called him, and said, I’ll work for you, but you're not paying me this
much. Bill is one of the best guys you'll ever meet, one of the most generous guys you’ll ever meet. So
we negotiated, and he got me there and I was checking the Jiffy Lubes at first, and then he said, hey, I
want you to go into sales. And I said, ah, Bill, I'm not a salesman. He said, let me rephrase that, you're
going into sales. So I said, ok. So I went in and spun my tires for a while, and started doing well with
sales, so I've been moving up and stuff like that. So between family and work, and I was doing one or
two classes at a time, just telling myself, it’s not a race. But yes, I am going to finish. We ended up
building a house, which, I've sucked up to do with my wife. I was gone for two years of our marriage, so
part of that is we wanted to get a new home. We built the house, and that was a nightmare! (Laughs.)
So when we were going through all that, I was thinking, you know, I'm not going to do school. I finished
the semester; we moved in with my parents and I finished the semester, but it was such a-so the rest of
the term I got done. And now every weekend- we've got to get our yard put in at a certain time, so I've
been working in the yard every weekend. Well, I'm helping my brother in law, he's doing our yard. He's
an excavator, and he's building a rock wall for us. I'll probably start in the spring semester.
CM: That's great. Well I want to thank you for coming here today, it’s been an honor talking with you.
TM: My pleasure.
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TM: It was really cool, when I first got home Coach Madsen, the baseball coach here, and Coach Carter-I
played with Coach Carter, and I got to be really good-in fact, Coach Carter and I go to breakfast quite
often. Utah Valley baseball was a huge release for me, because they were in season when I first got
home, and I would come and just hang out. It got me back to not being Sergeant Meranda anymore,
because when I played baseball I was TJ. So I'd come, and they were a huge part of my life. Coach
Carter said, hey- it was the last game- and he said, would you mind throwing out the first pitch? I said,
come on, Coach. He said, would you please? So I did, and it was cool. It was fun to be back on the field.
Being a baseball player and going to the Marine Corps when we were throwing grenades and stuff, the
grenade range is just a box. And I said, what if you throw it outside the box? The guy said, don't worry,
you won't throw it outside the box. So I threw it, and it went outside the box. They said, Stop! Who
threw that? Cease fire! I said, it was me. He said, Do it again! They handed me another grenade and I
threw it out of the box again. He said, where the hell did you learn how to throw like that? I said, I was
a baseball player, I was a catcher. And when you throw a grenade you’ve got to throw it like a catcher
does.
And then in boot camp I got in trouble. They want to break you down, but I thought boot camp was a
good time. Yeah, you get yelled at and stuff, but you do calisthenics all day and you work out, and I
thought, that's not bad. So my drill sergeant decided he was going to break me. He said, Meranda-we
were doing rifle drill-and he said, Go in the corner and squat and hold your weapon out. So I went in the
corner and squatted for about an hour; he left me there for an hour. And then when we were done, he
has everyone pick it up, and he said, alright, watch this! Go ahead, go ahead and go, and he thought I
was going to get up all sore. And I just got up and walked off. He said, what?
So that night we were cleaning the squad bay and he yelled, Meranda, get in my office now! I go in,
Recruit Meranda on deck. He said, Come in! So I go in and close the door. He said, “Talk to me,
Meranda!” And in boot camp you have to talk in the third person. You can't say "I" or "me," it’s always,
Recruit Meranda. He said, “Talk to me normal.” Yes, sir. My senior drill instructor-not the one that had
me doing it, but my other one, he was standing in the back behind him. He asked, “Meranda, before
you came in the Marine Corps, what did you do?” I said, “I worked at Holladay, sir.” He said, that's not
what I'm saying, what did you do? I said, I went to college, sir. He asked, and in college, what did you
do? I said, I studied. He said, I don't care what you studied. What extracurricular activities--why did
you go to college, Meranda? Because he had my full transcript. I said, I was on a baseball scholarship at
Utah Valley. And he asked, what position did you play? I was a catcher. And he turned around and
looked at the other drill instructor, and he said, “Get out of my face! Get away from me!” So I got
thrashed pretty good the next day for that. He said, “So is squatting in the corner for an hour
punishment for you?” I said, not really sir. So the next day was, oh they came up with other things that
I got to do (laughs.)
1:33:04.5
TM: And Coach Roberts, he was the coach at BYU for a while, he was a great coach, but I had a lot of
UVU connections. I got letters from UVU. I actually ran into a couple of professors, when I came home.
They see so many people, and one came up and said hi to me, and I said, you remember me? He said,
we didn't have very many people go into the service after they took my class, and I remembered you.
And then when I got hit, the news did come out with something, it was like, Sgt. Todd Allen Meranda, Jr.
Growing up in Orem, there are very places I can go where I don't know somebody. So my parents were
22
getting tons of phone calls from my coaches, they were stopping by the house. My parent didn't know
much. But it was kind of cool to hear that they got so much support, and my wife was getting calls.
CM: People cared.
TM: Yes, it was really neat, and Utah Valley [University] was a big supporter. So I was pretty proud to
say, I go to Utah Valley [University.]
END OF INTERVIEW 1:34:22.9